My life being Bipolar

So I decided that its time for a change in my life. I need to lose weight, which I’m going to be starting one Jan. 5th. When I’ll have enough money to get just fruits and vegs, and lean meats. I plan on cutting my calorie intake and exercising a lot more.

I’m also planning on when we move to the big town about getting a job. I figure if I get a waitress job and save my money I’ll be getting my medical transcriptist course a lot sooner, which means I’ll be able to pay off my bills a lot sooner. And My husband and I can move into a bigger apartment, maybe a two or three bedroom, in a really nice neighborhood, or getting a house somewhere outside of the town.

I also plan on eating stuff that will help my bipolar, so I can keep on top of all this and making it a lot easier on me. A friend of my husband brought up a really good point, that bipolar is just an non balance of a certain chemicals in our brains, like diabetics who need insulin because the body does not produce enough of it. Maybe that’s the way it is for bipolar, that our bodies just don’t produce enough of a chemicals that we can get thru eating so foods. Well I’m going to try and test this theory to see if it works for me. 

Well I’m rambling again. Talk to you tomorrow.

Yeah it doesn’t feel like it should be the end of 2008 yet, but in 2 more days it will be. I did very well with xmas this year. We got a new tv, he got his meat and cheese thing and some old spice, and money. I got a scrapbook kit (now i need to get some pictures), sweater, money, and momma mia soundtrack. With part of my money I got a vaccum cleaner, two pc games, a 1GB of ram, a book shelf, and some 5 buck movies.

Though I can’t believe Christmas is over already, and the new year is almost here. But this coming year I do plan on getting healthier, so My husband and I have a better chance at getting a baby sometime next year.  Losing weight and being able to get a kid by next year are my main goals in 2009, well and getting a job so I can take my medical transcription course so we are better off money wise.

Well I better stop rambling and get on to doing some other stuff.

I really feel like crawling back into to bed and sleeping for a couple days and waking up and working on this for the mini vacation. But I really just need to get the clothes done, so we have what we want for xmas stuff.

I think I’ll do it tomorrow, but I do have to get the stuff out of the washer and put them into the dryer and fold his grandfather’s clothes, but i really don’t want to do it. LOL I wish I had gotten this all done a week ago then i wouldn’t have so much clothes to clean.

Maybe if I do go back to bed or just wake up some more I’ll get off my butt and get some more laundry done.

OMG!! I got Mamma Mia last night and it wouldn’t play at all, it sucked. So my husband took it back and exchanged it, so hopefully when he gets home i’ll be able to watch it, when i get dinner fixed which won’t take long tonight.

I just wanted to say that I slept through the whole night. Which is something I never really do as you all know. So when I can sleep the whole night it makes me really happy.

On another note we only have 6 more days until Christmas. I’m so excited about it, because we are making a trip up to Indiana on Christmas Eve and then coming back home Christmas night. Yeah I know whats the point of going up if its only that long. Well its been a month since I seen my family and plus I missed my first Thanksgiving with my family I’m not going to miss another major holiday with them specially Christmas.

Well today I plan on doing as many loads of laundry I can, since we need clothes for our trip. Though i wish i could get some new clothes for Xmas but we don’t have the money. Then I plan on making the bed and then wrapping the rest of the gifts that the hubby said he will do and never gotten to it. And making sure Xmas cards get sent out to the people we won’t see on xmas.

Well thats about it. See ya

As you all know I was planning on doing a detoxic today, but decided since I was moving around a lot today that it wouldn’t be a wise decision.

Which by the way I got 6 bags of trash out of that room next to me. I made a lot bigger dent in it today and was planning on finishing it tonight, but i’m to wore out from just those big bags of trash today. On Saturday I’m going to make the hubby clean the rest at least 6 bags clean. Hopefully thats all that will be left in that room and I can sweep and mop, then my husband and I can move the Furniture   around, before we leave for my parents next wednesday.

We are planning with whatever money we end up with for Christmas that we are going to use it to buy us a TV to put upstairs, so I can watch TV also during the day. And then we have to shop for each other, because we are getting each other something after the holidays because we will be able to get more stuff with the little money we have, plus we are going to get Christmas stuff for next year. Its going to be a mad house at Walmart.

Well I better get to cleaning this room up and starting another load of his grandfather’s clothes.

I’ll put the last bipolar type on here tomorrow, but I thought since I haven’t journalized  in awhile thought that I might do it. I’ve been really tried lately and been getting sick to my stomach at night. So I figured its time to detoxify myself tomorrow and the day after that. I just need to clean out my system so it can start working again.

I just hope I can actually make it through the next 48 hours with being able to do this. I don’t have very good will power, but I’m hopping my lower back will help me keep in line with the detoxifying.  I know this has nothing really to do with bipolar, but in away it does because of not being able to finish anything because of the bipolar. I’m going to try and not let that effect me this time.

Well i’m going back to bed night.

With this disorder you get irritable a lot. You get depressed but not depressed-depressed, not clinically depressed. Still you know something’s wrong. It’s been years since you really felt yourself, like your old self, for more than a few days at a time. Cyclothymia is the mildest form of the bipolar disorders, but it’s also the most persistent. If you’re cyclothymic, you experience episodes of mild depression as well as episodes of hypomania that look a lot like depression; anger, irritability, and sadness. These moods can hang around for years, never really quite letting go. In fact, Cyclothymia is defined as two years of usually irritable hypomania, with less than two months between each episode. This form can have a real impact on your life and often takes a toll on your career, your relationships, and your self-esteem. And as many as one in three cases, the mood swings will get wider and you’ll wind up with a bipolar 1 or 2 diagnosis. In fact, some clinicians think of cyclothymia as a precursor to bipolar disorder rather than one of its forms. Others think it’s basically indistinguishable from bipolar 2. And still others wonder whether it’s a disorder at all.

Bipolar 3 doesn’t actually exist, at least not in strict medical parlance. But most people who work in the field say that there is definitely a third type of bipolar disorder. One in which you have a family history of bipolar disorder and you become hypomanic only after treatment with antidepressants for a major depressive episode. The problem is that although clinical experience demonstrates that treatment with antidepressants clearly stimulates mania in some people, the DSM-IV and other diagnostic tools all indicate that you don’t have bipolar disorder if your mania or hypomania is brought on by drugs or medications. In a study done in France, involved 48 psychiatric working in 15 different psychiatric centers with a total of nearly 500 patients with major depression. Of these patients, it turned out, nearly 40 percent had experienced one or more episodes of hypomania, and quarter of those were the result of antidepressant treatment (interesting what medicines that are suppose to help us can do).

In general, the patients who were hypomanic because of the antidepressants were very similar to those who were bipolar 2. The main difference, the physicians noted, was that the people with antidepressants-induced hypomania were more severely depressed, than the bipolar 2 patients. Noneless, the doctor who ran the study notes, they were just as likely to eventually be given lithium or another mood stabilizer as the bipolar 2 patients. The DSM-IV’s refusal to acknowledge these people as bipolar, the doctor and his colleagues write, “flies against experienced clinicians who make the decision to treat them the way they treat other bipolar spectrum patients.”

Bipolar 2

If you’re bipolar 2, you’ve never been out-and-out manic, but instead you have gone through at least one or more hypomanias, as well as at least one major depression. It’s tempting to talk about bipolar 2 as less severe than bipolar 1. The symptoms of mania are less striking than bipolar 1. And in bipolar 2 your more likely to return to “normal” between hypomanic and depressive episodes. In a study notes that bipolar 2 patients spent a lot of their time with symptoms of depression, more often than not. But bipolar 2 has its own special brand of treachery. The “normal periods” are shorter than in bipolar 1. You’re more likely to keep having them over and over. Bipolar 2 has a more chronic course than bipolar 1. Your also going to experience more rapid cycling. Because of the amount of time you spend in depression episode your more likely to commit suicide than someone who is bipolar 1. This is a particularly devastating issue, because bipolar 2 disorder is two or three times more common than bipolar 1.

So I’ve done this one before, but I found the book that’s been packed away since we moved here. And it gives great defining the many faces of bipolar as the book calls it. So this week I plan on doing articles from this book I’ve read. It helped me a lot when I was trying to understand my bipolar.

So you got…

Bipolar 1

Bipolar 1 is manic-depression at its dubious best. During this type you’ve experienced at least one full-blown manic or mixed episode and likely at least one major depression as well. In nearly three-quarters of bipolar 1 cases, mania and depression will switch off in a somewhat orderly progression, there’s really no rhyme or reason to the episodes: depression might lead to mania, or mania to depression. These can be mixed in a single week or day, or they can be separated by months or even years. It kind of sucks when you go thru in a single day. Bipolar 1 is the most severe form of bipolar disorder. If you have bipolar 1 and don’t treat it, you’re likely to experience as many as four mood episodes a year. Untreated manias might last for four months or more—- eternity spent in a world of frenzy. Untreated depression can linger for months and months on end; some can even last for a year or more. There are six different subtypes that can be diagnosed in bipolar 1.

·         Bipolar1: single manic episode

·         Bipolar1: most recent episode hypomanic

·         Bipolar1: most recent episode manic

·         Bipolar1: most recent episode mixed

·         Bipolar1: most recent episode depressed

·         Bipolar1: most recent episode unspecified

As of 2004 Bipolar 1 affects more than 1 million people in the Untied States, or about 1 percent of the population. Despite the fact that it is the best-known and most easily recognized form of the disorder, it is not the most common form